An earlier time

An earlier time
My autographed "Bobby Seale" copy

Thursday, September 08, 2005

The Experiment

I have long believed that my children are dead set sometimes on trying to reverse the tone of the day from good to bad. Lately I have experimented to find out if this belief is valid. Upon completion of a satisfactory period of observance I found that not enough circumstantial evidence exists to say the belief is true but there is enough to say that it is probable. In light of that revelation I have endeavored to answer the question "Why?"
First let me enlighten you how I set up this experiment. Each morning when we awaken I struggle to keep the boyz on a regular tight schedule since I take them to 2 different schools and they have to be there at 2 different times. I am unable to give them their medicine immediately after rising. Meds must be structured so that they can focus at their full potential for school and beyond so I am forced to deal with full blown ADHD symptoms before and during breakfast! They focus on fighting with each other. Their impulses cause distraction from their meal and helps to delay the rest of getting ready for school. I began to notice that each time I began the day with a very happy mindset somewhere along the line their behavior worsened and certainly gave me no opportunity to remain happy. On the mornings that I openly expressed my feeling that it was such a wonderful day their negative reactions were almost immediate. I decided to try to express that feeling every day for 4 days. Each of those 4 days the boyz began the day in a good mood UNTIL I voiced my opinion. Lennon went from a clinging "Daddy, you are great!" boy to demon child. Zak would say anything he knew would upset Lennon and I would be exhausted, after dropping the last one off, from all the refereeing and pushing to get ready.
Then for 4 days I began the day with a solemn manner and said little beyond the normal pushing that it takes to get going and keep order. On these mornings they seem to try to determine my mindset by sometimes trying to impress me with doing the right things thereby getting a reaction from me or by trying to get me to talk more. The mornings, for them anyway, seemed to go easier. I concluded that, although they sought to exhort some type of control, it was me that actually controlled the outcome based on my reaction to their actions. The more stable and determined I seemed the more they tried to control my mood. They seemed aware when I was in such a happy mood that their good actions only made me happier and they seemed to feel more controlling by countering with that which they were already prone to do...give in to the impulse to be difficult.
I suppose that from now on my best recourse is to keep most of my happiness to myself until I figure a way to make it contagious!....For me there again is a song that describes my life....Ringo Starr's "It Don't Come Easy". Love to all....Jeff